Fall musings

The last weeks have carried winds of nostalgia. I am trying to buckle down and do the extra fall cleanings and canning the harvest of summer, but my mind is distracted too often. Like wind piled leaves, nostalgic memories just whisper to me until  I jump in the pile and let the breeze wisp over my mind.
Basically i am not getting much work done but I am really enjoying fall. ;)
I grew up in a subdivision I wont pretend to have the same work ethic and stomach of a true country / farm girl. My mother is such a one and i do not compare. But i have memories of canning and picking fruit from rows of Grandpas orchard. -There is nothing quite like the feel of fall air around you as you pick apples, and later can and preserve them.
But mostly I have been in a very lazy comfortable sort of nostalgia.
I have been overwhelmed with the silly but firm desire to reread children books and watch old TV series. Like a tugging wind of fall (I LOVE wind) . I have been reading Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle books, watching Sabrina the teenage witch and and curling up with fuzzy blankets and cups of cider. Eating and baking.
It might perhaps seem odd that reading certain books and watching certain shows is a sort of nostalgic memory i have associated with fall but i don't think so. All things we did as children seem to take a certain form in memory. I jumped into the pile of leaves and smelt the delicious and musky aroma. I drank the REAL apple cider (the kind you have to shake to keep from settling) I had plenty of time to read.
In my family we also have a love for English literature and the TV series BBC inevitably makes from the famous classics they can claim. I grew up encouraged to read said great classics, once I was in junior high i began to read all the wonderful books on my moms many book cases, Jane Austen Novels and The Bronte Sisters, Charles Dickens, as I grew older I learnt of Elizabeth Gaskell and Oscar Wilde, my sisters (and mom of course) and i watched and read and loved so many of these great authors stories. I don't know why I have associated them with fall but it seems I have because every year I get the urge to read the same books and watch the same shows. (it also happened at every other season but with different books)  I have been listening to Pavradi (that association with fall is not an upbringing thing but i think it might be from when i had music major roommates in college), watching North and South (okay if you have never watched that BBC show go watch it right now- for real) and of course reading Little Women (its a classic).

The fall books and shows I "have" to read/ watch are:
Little Woman- Louisa May Alcott
Mrs. Piggle Wiggle- Betty MacDonnald
Farmer Boy- Laura Ingalls Wilder (sometimes followed by reading all the other books)
The Sherwood Ring
Persuasion- Jane Austen (sometimes followed by another of her books)
Poetry of Edgar A Guest
Taming of A Shrew- Shakespeare- Sometimes I just watch the movie
Jane Eyre- Charlotte Bronte
Cook Books- yup
Sabrina the Teenage Witch- TV series
North and South-BBC mini series
Wives and Daughters- BBC
Its the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown-and the thanksgiving one too.
Bewitched -Old TV series
Magic town- B&W with Jimmy Stewart (also Charade is good with Cary Grant and Audrey Hepburn)
Around Christmas it becomes absolutely necessary for me to read the traditional short story - A Christmas Carol by Dickens.

Around Christmastimes end when winter is still in full swing I read voraciously . Call of the Wild by Jack London is a must, as well as Tom Sywer and Huckleberry Finn.(those books help me feel like its not really ugly winter outside)  I must read LM Montgomery  books and of course as spring sets in I read all my new books- or the book I have never read before. It kinda mirrors the season.
Although I must be honest I read new books all year round its just that I don't reread old books so much in spring. I honestly don't read much at all in summer (comparatively speaking-I probably go from a 2 book a week average to a 1/2-1 book a week average- because I am busy climbing mountains or dreaming of climbing mountains).
Recently i finished a few books that just didn't quite thrill me (they are romantic christian novels not dirty or horror novels) but i just was not excited by them i think i have to reread them. I have been reading so much non fiction recently that i think my mind is having a problem switching modes.

Question when you count how many books you read in a year (which i don't because its to many to keep track of, but mostly because I am lazy and forget) do you only count books that you have never read before? That's what makes sense to me but i guess that is not strictly a "books i read list" because any reading is reading right?   Is there a rule about that?

this strange life

life is almost strange sometimes, I still am "me", but sometimes I have a moment where I stop in the middle of my messy kitchen and tune out the hyper-active boys and think.... "I am just going through the motions". Its sad I mean who wants to feel like they are living mostly in auto pilot. I feel in that moment compelled by some deep desire to switch mindsets, to throw wide the door, to bask in the energy of my two boys. But the moment passes as , before a resolution is formed, some minute thing snaps me out of my revere and I am once again set to some kind of auto pilot feeling lost in a sea of stresses and burdens that have no end in sight.
Its both humbling and oft times depressing.
I know that circumstances that are difficult can become blessings,  great strengths, or opportunities, at least learning experiences. But I have times where I feel like an overtired child thinking things like: "Lord I don't want to be better, or stronger, or handle my trials well, I just want my trials taken away" Eventually I come around and humble myself, but ohh in those times when I feel like I don't want to deal with it anymore, I really don't want to deal with it anymore. On those days I often feel like when I pray for comfort or relief I get just a little bit, but its enough for that hour.The need to pray often keeps me from going into auto pilot and helps me really notice the important things going on right now (like how kayden calls everything he wants a snack, "nack na".

*This is part one of a 3 part series to see parts two and three click the links below!
part 2
part 3
I know that Jesus Christ is our Savior, We are God's children and He loves us!
To learn more about what we believe as members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day-Saints (Mormons) follow this link.

the food we eat

This week i was able to go to a restaurant with my parents (as i mentioned in the post about Monday) and my aunt uncle, their son my grandpa and my other cousin.Whew- that was a list. The place was a Mexican food restaurant and my uncle watched a bit and then observed that he was quite surprised to see my 22 month old and 3 year old eating SO much salsa. They are generous with salsa on each chip. It surprised me that it surprised him and then we talked about other foods, he is one of those people who does not like spicy things (totally fine i am one of those people who don't like sea food (gasp)). I mentioned curry asking  if he liked that -because it is a different kind of spicy, he doesn't like any kind of spicy.
It occurred to me later that it might be a bit unusual for the average american Idaho raised children to eat so many spicy foods. (unless that is their culture-for example a Mexican family would eat those foods) we all have family cultures we create which is so much fun!
Basically My husband has cilacs's disease (i know most all of you know that) and we (and our doctors) are watching Eli, kayden has been GF since he was tiny. Since 1/2 of our house eats Gluten free we all do. (i don't want to have to worry about cross contamination etc especially since Eli shows some symptoms anyways) Many types of cuisine-like ,ti food, Chinese food and Mexican (not Texan) food are pretty much GF if you make them from scratch. That is because those foods (not always the american way) use things like corn tortillas,and  rice noodles instead of wheat. So my kids probably don't think of curry and salsa as unusually spicy since they have those things all the time.
It was fun to think about and i thought i would put it here, so if any of you see us at a some kind of gathering with food and wonder why we don't try more things that's why.
Pssst- if anyone wants gluten free recipes or something i have some good ones!

Also i did a first yesterday! I helped my mom can apricot jam.
2 years a go i canned cherry pie filling all by myself and last year i helped with tomatoes, freezer jam and fruit mix but i have not yet helped with jam (not in my adult years). It is so pretty!!!

I just think that is SO pretty!

My handsome Eli Boy!!!

This weekend we have a special little occasion planned-its a secret! I am so excited! We have a first coming up too-and you know how much i like firsts!
Also i made a somewhat minuscule but biggish decision a few weeks a go to live more intentionally. It involves so many little decisions about small day to day things, but one of them was a silly thing, along with cleaning out all my closets and getting rid of so many things in my house that i don't use,  or use but don't  like, i got rid of TONS of kids clothes that i just really don't love the style of and last weekend i spent some money (not too much but some) getting each of my kids some new clothes we all like. It was a silly thing but i am so excited! Also we only buy them clothes like once a year when they outgrow EVERYTHING they own (because we don't have much spending money) so it was time anyways.
PS-You guys have got to try this- slice a yellow summer squash longways thinly use it in sandwiches, i made grilled cheese the other day and put the squash right next to the cheese and everyone in my family loved it-the kids didn't even notice-i used Colby jack cheese but i don't think it would matter what kind! Its was so fun to know i got my kids to eat their veggies without them noticing i felt very stealthy!

Sweet Corn

Its getting hot here, hundreds today, the only types of things that make such heat bearable in a place with not so many pools (as in none i can go to) are things like the 4th of July, cold treats and corn on the cob.
Its hot here in a not humid way and i am not going to say which is worse because i have never lived with humidity but i will say this, here the heat beats down on you so when i say its hot it should be implied that when you step outside you feel like a grape turning into a raisin, you sweat stuff moisture out of you into air with no moisture at all and feel yourself dehydrate.
I think i am complain so much about the heat because i have no AC.
Back to the post, isn't it fun to see things as your kids see them, watch their excitement so pure and enthusiastic?
The other day we had a very summery dinner including corn on the cob , i had to take pictures.
Eli at 2 big ones on his own, kayden ... well he was not as excited but when we got snow cones last night he was thrilled and finished the whole thing! I love spending evenings with my kids its a time of day (around dusk) when everything seems in a peaceful slow motion. I can remember every detail and drink up every smile for my kids and store them away for the times i need them.
PS i am happy to say i actually got up at 5:45 and ran today! One small victory!
I am also happy to say i have tried more healthy new recipes recently and recommend a few of them , Zucchini Au gratin, the pineapple and coconut milk sorbet ,and this is not new but next time you make curry use fresh ginger, basil and peppers, SO good you will never go back to dried! (also i usually use real coconut milk too , for the taste)
This week we have a big Durrant reunion. It will be fun to see people and of course they have all sorts of cool things like a zip line- oh yeah!
Happy wednesday

Books

"Parting is such sweet sorrow...."
Okay so today is not a Shakespearean tragedy, but i do feel dramatically sad as i sort through my books....again.
A few months ago i began a decultter your life in 31 days thing, then i forgot about it. In my defense in the 7-10 days i did do it I got rid of a ton of stuff. I went to DI 3 separate times with a huge trunk full/ at one point it filled a good part of the car too. Then my hubby expressed the thought that we could have a yard sale.
Oops, i guess i got rid of some prime stuff by that time.
So As requested by my husband (and on my part required for mental sanity) i am once again beginning a room by room, closet by closet de-cluttering our house.
Today's task is the Library. As in-my room full of books.
I am having to ask really hard questions to myself.
Do i REALLY need a copy of this book. Will the kids REALLY read this one day. Will i miss it if its gone. Is the sentimental value i have attached to this enough to keep it, is it a really special thing or just a thing i have made special in my mind? (like the set of books i got for a children s lit class in college)
Basically i am actually getting rid of alot of books. (which is saying something because a few months ago in my other purge i got rid of two big boxes of books.
So i sit in this confusion and debate and cry and remember.

A few days ago Eli s outside with me drawing with side walk chalk and then we started taking about pictures and , he drew a picture of me! This is a big deal because up till now he has had very little interest in drawing People. So I took pictures to record forever! I love my boy!

I am the one in the bottom corner, he was working on kayden when i took the pic. 

This is a pity party.

Umm, so just to be clear, I am still sick.
 I sound bad, really, I think I am somewhere between a creepy whisper voice in a scary movie and an old toad.
 I cant hear well either and I have a constant head ache which I am sure is doing strange things to my face expressions.
So tragically I had to miss my cousins fiances bridal shower. (that's a mouthful). Just to be really clear; Total bummer.
My cousin who is in the family that I am very close with; I like to think I am part theirs. (well I was once, I have not been social lately(as in the last 5 years)) and who I always got rides with in college and who first taught me that drums were cool. He and his brother also taught me that boys were gross and sometimes whipped each other with dirty gym socks. (I actually did see them do that once or twice)
 That cousin.
The J-man.
 SO sad. I have not even met his fiance yet so I was really excited to be invited and go.
hence the pity party I am throwing. I would invite you but,  you know I am sick, and I sound like a dying animal.
But my mother is going and together she and I bought her (the unknown fiance) a great gift. And then we wrapped it in a beautiful trendy adorable way, because we are a great gift giving team. And because my mom is really nice and she took me shopping for the gift and watched my kids all day so I could rest, and then she brought me to her house so I could help wrap the gift. (thank you mom).
Also because Mitchell was nice enough to make dinner and encourage me to go out and spend money (that he worked to earn) and then he bought me really nice cough medicine that helps so much that I can actually get out of bed and be somewhat functional (somewhat).
So to End this pity party.
Congrats to the bride-to-be.
I hope I get better.
My Husband is amazing.
My mom is the best.
Also thank you to "Uncle" Joseph who played with my kids all day (and many other days).
I will not be calling any of you wonderful friends until my voice is less creepy toad.
I might call family (this means you mom and Becky) so be prepared to talk to a creepy toad voice.
The End.
Also check out this Mormon Message- Gets me teary every time.Also its awesome!

Coming soon the story of the only music globe that survived my childhood. (its a nicer, funnier story then it sounds like).

Sick Days

My kiddos are sick again.
 I am pretty sure its croup, again.
They have the tell tell cough and high fevers that came on all of a sudden. Viruses are mean monsters. I had great plans today to be really productive and organize my files (really I did). Since they just want me to sit and cuddle with them while they nap on and off and watch way to many hours of TV i decided organizing can wait.
 Last night we all painted the side walk with water and shared a small blue raspberry snow cone. I closed  my eyes and said a prayer hoping I can remember all these special days when they are little. Today I have two little boys who want nothing more then to be held by their mama. Its strange to think that someday they will be bigger and they wont want to play outside with me or have me read them 10 stories in a row or snuggle while we watch movies. I better just enjoy today and give my little ones all the love I can.
Maybe I will be productive and organize my home tomorrow or the next day....
But that's a big Maybe.
 I hope everyone's Wednesday is healthier then ours seems to be and that you all give your little ones (or not so little ones) a big hug!

The boys with daddy at the Sand dunes 

TV shows-and more importantly, snow cones!

You know TV sho3wes?

I wont wait for your response I will just assume you do know of them.

Well I am not your typical TV viewer. I am quirky in the ways I do thing.

For example do you remember friends? )Everyone seems to) –Get this I have never watched one single episode.

Wait there’s more… Reality shows? Don’t watch them, I have seen a few episodes of “so you think you can dance” but not on TV more like seeing a few routines off of you tube.

Don’t even ask about those hospital shows. Not interested.

I do have a few shows that I do watch though…. But not in a “normal way”

I hope you all recall (and surly you do)  “the office” yes that show was big when I was in high school and mostly college (people would have “the office parties” –I went to BYUI (an LDS university)-they have nice clean party’s at those places) the “peer pressure” to watch the office was great. However the excitement everyone else had for the show did not encourage my participation, it might have even fueled my –I am so not going to watch that show-attitude.

But life is a funny thing. I was so cocky about my lack of TV show watching –ness.

The office ran from 2005-2013 (I had to google that because I honestly didn’t know)

I didn’t watch any of it until every single season became available on netflicks- and then for a reason I have quite forgotten- I watched them all. (over a good few month period) mostly while I folded laundry during naptime.

Yup. After everyone else was done and moved on I finally decided I liked the show and watched the whole thing.

So a few years ago I heard about a British show-a period drama called (you guessed it) Downton Abbey.

Sounded like my type of show I am after all a lover of classic British literature and period shows in general.

But I did not watch the show-or feel intense interest in it-after all-it was a TV show, and a drama at that.

My sweet husband has suggested several times that I try watching it-its on amazon prime- so last night I did.

That was a dumb idea, 3 hours later I realize its eleven thirty and I didn’t even fold my laundry while I watched. I was hooked and wanting to watch another episode right then.  

You are guessing where this is headed right?

Nope you’re wrong.

Sorry (I could not resist) See the problem was that I sat up and felt annoyed- I don’t  want to feel like I have to watch to find out such and such because all of the plots and sub plots are ridiculous. So I got up this morning and wasted my time reading spoilers finding out what happens in the next seasons (up to season 5 which I can only presume is going on now) and its all out of my system. To tell you the truth I am quite relived it seems like an incredibly annoying show to be really into-all of the stupid plot turns and sordid junk.

I think I am just the Seinfeld type- I love that show-its about nothing.

Other shows I Like that are “current” are:

Psych –except not now the year long break and the so-so last season lost our interest –but we own the first 6 seasons

The big Bang Theory- Got the first 4 season for Christmas-watched them all-Tried watching each week, again lost interest.’

That’s all folks

 

FHE at Lake Lowell

Skipping rocks together-my boys

I love this cute pie

the first snowcone

I want more

Also here are the pictures from the kids Very first Snow Cones!

(I worked in a snow cone shack during my summers in high school- so this was fun for me)